Unimpressed People Review Our Work Vol. 4

We asked a teenager, and it turns out that our films are garbage compared to 'Vampire Diaries'.
Inspiration / Written by: Lasse Cato
Marie 2.jpg

We produce a lot of films here at Bacon. We think most of them are good. Some are even great. But we are, of course, biased. So, to get an honest opinion, we've decided to ask some of the most notoriously unimpressed people we know to review a selection of our films.

The Reviewer: Marie Jermiin

16-year-old Marie is the youngest daughter of our Copenhagen/Stockholm MD & EP, Mette. Marie is a first-year high school student living at home, and because of the pandemic she has been spending way more time in the house than she wants to. To be specific, half of her freshman year has been limited to online classes because of the pandemic, which means no school parties, functions or casual hangout sessions with friends.

Instead, she spends most of her time in her room and her screen time has skyrocketed to about 13 hours a day, split between Zoom, Instagram, watching Vampire Diaries and online shopping. Her mom can go full days without really seeing her with only sparse communication through text messages.

For most 16-year-olds being unimpressed is like a national sport, and Marie is the Serena Williams of that sport; A generational talent.

These extraordinary skills of indifference are made painfully clear before the interview is even set up. Mette seems sure that her daughter is willing to help out, but my first text to Marie goes unanswered and shortly thereafter I am told that she has berated her mom for asking me, a random grown-up communications man, to write her. As she says: "I don't even know him".

"Don't worry", I tell myself, "I used to be a young person, I can be cool. I'll just write her again, asking her to review some films in a no-strings-attached kind of way". No answer again. A few days later, Marie asks what will be in it for her, if she is to be a part of our little newsletter.

Nice try, but we are obviously not going to pay this girl to help us, I think to myself. Not in a million years, I think.

A couple of weeks later, I find myself at Marie's door with a considerable amount of cash and a tunacado sandwich/vanilla shake combo from her favorite lunch spot.

Unimpressed and smart teenager: 1 - Bacon: 0.

Unlike us, you can enjoy this interview for free, so go find yourself a tunacado sub, get comfortable and read Marie's scathing reviews below. And please watch the films first for full effect.

Vipps / Give Your Phone A New Start

Play video

Our description:
With his distinct brand of humor, Andreas Nilsson has directed the first campaign for Norwegian Vipps' new phone subscription. It is a fun, absurd and hopeful narrative of simple pleasures, fresh starts and cell phone carriers.

Director:
Andreas Nilsson.

What does Marie think?
"I could not figure out what this was about. It was fine to watch it once, but one time is enough. I would be annoyed if a saw it again. It doesn't make me want to buy a phone subscription. But I don't buy that stuff anyway, it's really my mom who needs to be convinced."

Interflora / Remember One Another

Play video

Our description:
More than 50 flowers were shot withering in time-lapse over the course of seven weeks to create this film for Interflora, highlighting the flower delivery network's new campaign against loneliness.

Director:
Martin Werner.

What does Marie think?
"That's sweet. I had a hard time understanding the voiceover, though, was it a small girl doing the speak? Her voice and the accent threw me off. But it's a good idea to draw parallels between dying flowers and loneliness. The brooch is nice."

Color Me

Play video

Our description:
Martin de Thurah's haunting short film with music by Active Child is an exploration of how we respond when we have to face our own fears and mortality. The visually stunning piece challenges the boundaries of film and is one of Martin's most ambitious projects ever.

Director:
Martin de Thurah.

What does Marie think?
"I didn't really get the concept and I was waiting for something to happen. It says Color Me, so I was waiting for some color. My mom forced me to watch a bunch of these types of films so I am used to it, but if my friends saw it, they would say: What the fuck is this? It gives me a strange and uncomfortable feeling, even though it is beautiful and well made."

Lundbeckfonden / The Brain Prize

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Our description:
There is a surprising number of similarities between images from space and images of the human brain, which is the premise for Ida Andreasen's spot for the world's largest brain prize.

Director:
Ida Andreasen.

What does Marie think?
"It looks good, but I didn't really get it. Not that I didn't understand the words, it is just forgettable. If I saw it on TV, I wouldn't remember it at all. Perhaps it is because it is so short. But I really don't think it should be any longer. Maybe it is more interesting for older people."

Médecins Sans Frontières Sweden / No Matter Who, No Matter Where, No Matter Why

Play video

Our description:
Real-life contributors are the focus of this fresh take on charity spots for MSF Sweden.

Director:
[https://baconproduction.com/directors/emilie-thalund](Emilie Thalund).

What does Marie think?
"I kind of liked it because it felt different and had a variety of people in it. But it is not a film that I feel like watching again. And it doesn't make me want to give to charity. Charity spots that make you feel bad just makes you want to support more. Maybe this strategy works for someone who's not 16?"

DNB / Evil Shopping Carts

Play video

Our description:
Remote-controlled shopping carts ambush unsuspecting drivers in the busiest parking garages in Oslo. A fun spot for car insurance with a classic candid camera feel.

Director:
Andreas J. Riiser.

What does Marie think?
"Pranks are funny, but you immediately think that this probably isn't real. Everybody knows that these kinds of videos are staged, so I don't think it's genius or innovative. I don't need to see it again, and I wouldn't show it to my friends. What time is it? I have to go get my phone because we're in this school project. I'll just mute it." [Gets up and leaves the room to return a minute later with her phone in hand.]

Kirkens Bymisjon / More for Less

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Our description:
Influencers' advice to be stylish on a budget shifts to heartbreaking tales from Norwegian kids growing up in poverty, highlighting the need to help these children through both awareness and political work.

Director:
Marc Reisbig.

What does Marie think?
"I actually liked this. I mean it's been seen before, and a lot of videos try to target young people. But the sentiment about the social pressure on young people and the line about it's expensive to be poor actually worked for me. It's true– Sorry guys, I'll be right there!" [Talking to her classmates on the phone.]

boy pablo / Hey Girl

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Our description:
For this music video, Norwegian indie phenom boy pablo is placed in a charming tale of first love narrated by Tiger King personality Rick Kirkham.

Director:
Eivind Landsvik.

What does Marie think?
"This was pretty cute, but it's not something I am planning on watching again. In general, my friends and I don’t really watch music videos. Unless there's a new Justin Bieber video or something like that. Watching a boy play soccer doesn't really make me want to listen to the song again. How many more films are left? We are doing this group project, and the others are not that impressed with me."

Hedvig / Insurance You Long to Use

Play video

Our description:
Another unique, humoristic and clever spot for Swedish insurance company Hedvig.

Directors:
Matias & Mathias.

What does Marie think?
"This is weird, because normally you wouldn't be happy when you lose your stuff. It's good to have insurance when something happens, but it is still a pain to find the new stuff and then there is the sentimental value. I don't know a lot about insurance, but this is not super convincing, and I am not really entertained. Now I have to hurry in and be a part of this project."

Tuborg Squash / Refreshingly Original

Play video

Our description:
After an eight-year campaign hiatus, Danish orange soda Tuborg Squash returns to its comedic advertising legacy with a magically awkward campaign directed by Holger Karberg, starring Holger Karberg and edited by, you guessed it, Holger Karberg.

Since Marie left the interview to be a part of her school project, we had to send this one to her afterwards to get her opinion. Her answer via text?
"Aw, that is really funny. Just showed it to my girls."

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